What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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