How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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