Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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