I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.

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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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