What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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