What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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