I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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