Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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