A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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