What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.

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