What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?

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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split

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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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