What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.

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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!

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