How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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