Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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