Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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