Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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