What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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