What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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