How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.

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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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