How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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