What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.

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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.

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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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