How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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