I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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