A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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