A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.

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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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