A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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