A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.

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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!

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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story

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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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