A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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