A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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