A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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