A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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