A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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