A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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