A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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