A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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