A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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