A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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