A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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