A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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