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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,
What a turtle disaster
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?
He was catching all the chickens!
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?
He decomposes.
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What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?
A conversation.
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What did the dog say to the flea?
Stop bugging me!
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?
"Trike or Treat"?
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?
One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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I tried nutella on some salmon
got salmonella.
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