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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,
What a turtle disaster
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
OH SNaP!
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
Fingernails.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?
Because all the fans left!
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?
Booberry pie!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.
She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why is b always cool?
Because it's between ac.
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Slept like a log last night........
Woke up in the fireplace.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?
They both have a hole in one!
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