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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,
What a turtle disaster
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?
Santa paws!!!
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?
In sundae school.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns
they always take things literally.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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When is a door not a door?
When it's ajar!
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How are elephants and trees alike?
They both have trunks
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?
Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?
Cause your the only one Hair.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?
3 blind mice.
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