A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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