A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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