A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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