A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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