A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop

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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.

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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.

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