A seal walks into a club...
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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