A seal walks into a club...
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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