A seal walks into a club...
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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