A seal walks into a club...
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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