A seal walks into a club...
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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