A seal walks into a club...
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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