A seal walks into a club...
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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