A seal walks into a club...
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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