A seal walks into a club...
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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