A seal walks into a club...
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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