Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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