Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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