Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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