And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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