And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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