Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."

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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.

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