Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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