Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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