Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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