Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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