Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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