Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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