Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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