Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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