Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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