Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.

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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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