Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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