Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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