Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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