Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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