Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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