Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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