Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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