Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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