Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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