Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).

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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet

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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.

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