Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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