Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.

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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!


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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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