Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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