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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.
Blue sky at night: day.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?
With its sparrowchute.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?
Laboratory Retrievers
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Where do horses live?
In the neigh-borhood.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?
With tomato paste.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?
Sherlock Bones.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?
Sell it and buy a violin
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?
Decalfinated
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