Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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