Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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