Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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