Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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