Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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