Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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