Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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