Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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