Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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