"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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