"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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