"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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