"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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