"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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