"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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