El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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