El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."

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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.

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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.

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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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