Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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