Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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