Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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