Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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