Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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