Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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