Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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