Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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