the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"
or
Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
or
Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
or
1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
or