H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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