H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!

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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.

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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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