H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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