H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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