H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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