H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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