H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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