Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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