Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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