Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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