Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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