Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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