Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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