Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?

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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.

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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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