Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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