Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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