Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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