Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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