Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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