Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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