How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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