How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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