How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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