How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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