How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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