How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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