How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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