How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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