How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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