How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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