How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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