How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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