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How can you get four suits for a dollar?
Buy a deck of cards.
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When is a car not a car?
When it turns into a garage.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?
She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?
Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?
Answer: The back of his head.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?
It was in a pickle!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?
A coat of arms.
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?
A river.
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What does the winner of the race lose?
His breath.
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How does a dog stop a video?
He presses the paws button.
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