How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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