How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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