How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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