How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!

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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.

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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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