How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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