How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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