How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.

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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.

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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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