How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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