How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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