How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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