How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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