How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks

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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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