How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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A seal walks into a club...
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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