How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish

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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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