How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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