How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.

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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats

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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks

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