How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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