How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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