How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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