How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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