How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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