How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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