How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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