How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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