How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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