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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?
With flood lighting.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?
A swordfish
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.
It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Went to the paper shop -
it had blown away.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?
"The erection is rigged!"
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.
It came in at quarter past four.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?
You go to the Library!
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Slept like a log last night........
Woke up in the fireplace.
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