How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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