How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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