How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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