How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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