How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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