How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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