How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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