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How did the butcher introduce his wife?
Meet Patty.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.
The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??
None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Where do orcas hear music?
Orca-stras
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?
Quark!
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?
Because they have a lot of spirit.
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