How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.

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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.

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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.

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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine

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