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How did the butcher introduce his wife?
Meet Patty.
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How much does a hipster weigh?
An instagram.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can't tuna fish.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
Fish and ships.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?
His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?
A Moo-sician!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?
Because there was no atmosphere.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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