How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.

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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats

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