How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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