How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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