How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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