How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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