How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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