How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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