How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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