How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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