How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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