How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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