How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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