How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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