How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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