How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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