How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.

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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."

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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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