How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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