How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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