How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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