How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.

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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!

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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.

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