How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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