How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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