How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic

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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.

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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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