How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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