How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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