How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!


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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.

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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story

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