How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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