How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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