How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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