How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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