How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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