How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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